I saw this on the back of an SUV the other day--
Here are the top ten interview questions for ZORT candidates:
- Are you alive? Prove it.
- Tell us a little bit about yourself. Stick to the parts of your life where you saved the world.
- Do you prefer the living or the dead? Explain your answer without offending the living or the dead.
- Describe your experience as it relates to hunting down dead people and ripping their heads off.
- Here's a situational. You are at work, minding your own business, when suddenly 900 bloody, hungry zombies start lurching toward you. How would you handle this situation?
- Have you ever seen the music video Thriller? If you were Michael, what would you have done differently?
- Have you ever worked at a Halloween Costume store? What did you like or not like about it?
- Can you lift more than 200 lbs? 250? 300? How much can you throw?
- Can you drive a forklift over dead bodies?
- Describe a time when you had a conflict with someone who was dead, angry and wearing a dirty business suit.
I would then ask the ZORT candidate to look at all the members of the interview panel and figure out which one of us was dead. (I would have planted a zombie interviewer on the panel beforehand.) If he or she chooses me as the zombie, not only does he/she not get the job, but I would know it was time for a facial and some new clothes.
-Hope Horner, 2013
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