Jesus,You are not my crutch.
Sure, it looks like I need someone to lean on,
Someone to help me take the weight off this nagging, nasty ache, but -
I'll hobble through this pain on my own.
No, really -- Don't even take me under my arm.
Don't try to assist me.
Thank you very much, but
I GOT THIS.
See? I have one good leg.
I can hop toward what deadens my pain,
I can make it to what soothes, satiates, calms.
Really. I'm almost there.
I might fall to a crawl these last few steps
But please don't gasp when I do,
Don't lean down with a helping hand.
I mean, no offense, but God helps those who help themselves, right?
If I stumble, I will pull myself up
And keep on keepin' on! One hop at a time.
You know, Jesus,
It's not that I don't appreciate the help you offer.
I don't resist you JUST because you made me so independent, so strong, so self-sufficient.
It's also because I am not sure you can handle the heaviness of my shame,
The weight I carry of knowing this injury is self-inflicted.
So this limp is mine to bear.
Anyway, Onward and upward!
Take it as it comes! Roll with the punches! Suck it up! Buck up! Tough it out! Power through! Push on! Keep on! Soldier on!
Wow. I sure am tired.
But I can do this.
-Copyright Hope A. Horner, 2012.
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